Happy Gratitude Giving
“When people are grateful they feel more alive.” That’s according to Robert Emmons, a professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis, and the author of Gratitude Works!
He recommends putting sticky notes around the house to remind ourselves of what we have to be grateful for. (Sixteen years of marriage and we haven’t killed each other yet.) How about (My daughter cleaned up her mess in the kitchen without being asked.) That could be in the miracle category. Just sayin!
Emmons's research also suggests that we get more bliss from feeling gratitude for people and experiences rather than things. More bang for our buck when we invest in people and fun experiences. And when we invest in fun experiences with people, it’s a double bang for our bucks.
Recognizing what we have to be thankful for can certainly boost our moods, but researchers say that it’s not enough to feel it, we need to express it.
Share details Emmons encourages, “Being personal and specific about gratitude is more important than expressing lots of it.” When we share our gratitude with those we love or work for or with, we need to focus on the details. Here are some examples: ”You were so patient with the kids, Dear. I am lucky to have a man like you for a husband.” ”Thanks for your patience with me this week, Honey. I appreciate when you take up the slack at home when work gets crazy.” “Junior, you were so helpful when the cousins were here even when the little ones were cranky. I am very proud of you.”
Psychologists pretty universally recommend keeping a gratitude journal (research shows that people who do so routinely are up to 25% happier than those who don’t.) Write it in a journal, open a doc on your computer or keep track on your phone. And every time you add something new to your list, reread your past blessings. Talk about a game-changer! At the top of your list note how every good gift comes from God: Psalm 136: 1 “Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good. His love endures forever.”
There’s more on the power of gratitude in our upcoming book:
Tech-Pecked or Tuned In: Finding God in a Digital World due out in January. We will be starting presales soon. Keep you posted...